Steph’s Blog

Just to clairify for the ignorant people we run into…and yes, some of these are people we know and have known for YEARS!

Yes, Scott and I have THREE daughters. Can you not count?

No, we do not have any boys. Do you need glasses?

Yes, we are head over heals in love with all three of our daughters. How can you think someone would love their children less because they do not have a penis? If you do, you do not deserve any children at all.

Yes, they make life crazy but not because they are girls. Don’t all kids make life crazy?

Yes, we have tons of pink. I love pink. Scott, not so much, but he certainly loves how his daughters look in pink.

We do not care care if you think boys are easier to raise than girls. If we wanted easy we would not have had children and probably would have bought a plant. That has to be the epitome of lazy if that is your reasoning for not wanting girls and you should probably not reproduce.

No, Scott does not feel like he is missing out on “all the fun stuff”. Ask him yourself and you might just get a knuckle sandwich. Considering Scott is pretty even tempered this is a big deal. I do not recommend asking him…or me for that matter!

Just for the record, Scott will be the first to tell you that girls can do anything boys can do. We just so happen to have ourselves a little t-ball player, a soccer lover, a GIRL who loves to watch Tiger Woods, a FEMALE child that can pick out the New York Yankees emblem and say ” that’s our team!” and she also happens to be starting karate. We also have a couple of girls who love bug hunting, fishing, and playing in the mud.

Why the defensiveness you ask? My six year old daughter has heard one too many negative comments about girls since we added a third daughter to our clan. I had no idea it was so unheard of to have more than one daughter. We happen to think we are pretty damn lucky. When we have a daughter that thinks it’s society’s general opinion that girls are not as valued as boys we get a tad irritated. If I have to spell it out for you then you are probably one of the morons who asks the above questions or makes one of the above mentioned comments. Seriously, it makes me want to throw up.

Do I have something against boys or sons? Not a chance…children are children. I have two gorgeous nephews and a handsome godson and I love them every bit as much as I love my daughters and my niece. Children are born to us as a gift. We are blessed and lucky to have them no matter what sex they happen to be.

If you feel the need to ask any of the above questions about our three (count with me folks…one…two…three!)girls, save your breath and just walk away. I hear knuckle sandwiches don’t taste all that great.

“A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the present, and the hope and promise of the future.”

Seriously, can someone please tell me why some people are so closed minded? Not even just closed minded but close minded and rude?

I swear if I hear the comment of “it must be so nice to be able to sit around the house all day with no real life pressures.”, or “what the heck do you do all day?” or anything like it I will go postal.

Is that what society really thinks of stay at home parents? That all we do is sit around the house and do nothing? I cannot fathom who they think takes care of the kids, the house, the unseen things that need to get done but no one else notices. I bust my ass around here day in and day out, night in and night out, 365 days a year and love it all. I still have to get up and “go to work” in the morning after pacing the floor for the last 10 hours with a crying baby just like working parents do, and no I do not get to sleep in. By the way, I “go back to work” for that same crying baby all day. It is hard work when you spend days AND nights on end with the same crying baby that wants nothing to do anyone else but Mommy, when there is nothing physically wrong with the little duffer but she just is not happy and nothing you can do consoles her. Until you have done that you have no clue what it is like to get up at 5am after you have had literally 1 hour of solid sleep only to do it again all day long. Oh wait, you say sleep when the kids nap? Yeah right. That is a joke in my world. There are still dishes to do, phone calls to return, bills to get paid, and I also help run the personal side business that my husband owns, so that means customer calls, billing, filing, all those little things that need to get done.
I have the utmost respect for working parents. My parents were working parents. They worked long hard hours to give all us kids the best things they could and that is amazing to me. I have friends that are working parents that think I must be nuts to want to stay home and raise the kids day in and day out. They cannot imagine how I handle having so little adult communication each and every day but they are proud of me to be able to do it. It makes me thankful each and everyday to be able to stay home and raise my children. Why is it so difficult for some working parents to see that we “stay at homes” do work just as hard, we just don’t do it at an office.

I have “friends” that think that I do nothing. The hardest hardest part of my day to them is deciding which soap opera to watch. I have news for those people, who do you think teaches my kids their ABC’s, how to tie their shoes, how to read and write, how to get along with others and to be a good person, how to walk and talk, how to do arts and crafts and the oh so fun potty training? Seriously do they think that my kids just learn it on their own? No they don’t. It’s hours of playing with them, and coloring and reading that teaches them these things. I do this before I can do any of the other things that need to be taken care of around the house. My day is a pretty full day from the time I am up at roughly 6am until I go to bed at 11pm.
I am not less of a human being, or less of a contributing member of society and I am not trying to “dumb down women in society” because I do not work outside the home(I am after all, a college educated woman with a degree). I am raising two beautiful, kind, intelligent and good hearted daughters. I work hard caring for them and loving them and my husband. Do not insult me as a person or as a mother for not working in an office or for not bringing in a paycheck. I would never in a million years think that anyone is a bad parent or less of a contributing member of society for going to work each and every day to provide for their family.

We as parents are all after the same goal here. That goal is to do what is best for our own individual families. I am proud of being home with my children and all the hard work I do for my family. I am proud of my husband for working so hard to be able to let me choose to stay home and raise our children. I am proud of all my working friends who love their kids and give them the best things in life. If I have been taught one thing in all this, it is that I will continue to raise my daughters to have an open mind. I will teach them not to treat people that may do things differently than them with less respect than they deserve.